Learning to live with chronic pain and fatigue can be a lonely and scary journey. Having someone standing along side you who understands what you are going through can make a world of difference. That is why I created this blog, website and Google+ community. It is my sincere desire to help show you that you never feel alone in your journey.
Monday, April 21, 2014
Looking for a Saviour
I have a knack of choosing cats that are "broken" in some way. I always gravitate towards the ones a little bit fearful, who shy away, or even run away (yikes!). When the inevitable moment comes and I dare complain about my broken kitties, my family is quick to remind me that I chose said kitty. So why do I keep choosing mentally unstable cats?? My answer -
If I don't take them, who will save them?
So I spend the next few months or even years loving on them, attempting to train them, getting frustrated with them, and wondering "why oh why... "
My latest love project
Left - Rich, Right - Lica
When I first met this brother and sister pair, they were five months old. They were the only remaining kittens from the litter. Why were they not adopted yet? Because they were black (no, really, that was the reason). So even though Rich shied away, and I really wanted a couple of Tabby cats, I said yes to this quirky pair. My hubby named them Lica and Rich - because they reminded him of black licorice. Lica actually settled in fairly quickly, but Rich was more nervous. Then, after having them for only a few months, we moved. Rich has never been the same since.
Looking for love in all the wrong places
Rich began acting out after the move. While I expected him to take a while to settle in, his behaviour took a strange turn. He didn't come to sit with me anymore. He didn't want to cuddle at all. He began wandering the house aimlessly yowling and clawing at the walls or doors. No matter how much I tried to draw him in, to show him that all the love and affection he so desperately wanted was right there waiting for him, nothing worked. But I didn't give up. I recently began behaviour modification strategies using strategically placed scratch posts and treats. Rich caught on very quickly and each time he would use his scratch post instead of the wall, I made a big fuss and gave him a treat. He LOVED it!! We were at this for just over a month, when the other day, as I lay in bed reading, he jumped on the bed (something he never does) and nuzzled in to my arm pit so tight I thought he would crawl under me if he could! It was wonderful to have this moment with him, listening to him purr and purr. Then, he did it again today, and I thought -
I wonder if God sees us this way
Today was Easter Sunday. As I listened to the Hour of Power, I couldn't help but draw some parallels. Rich could not see the love he craved even though it was right in front of his face. Unfortunately, I could relate. I spent decades looking for love in all the wrong places from all the wrong people, trying to fill a void that only God could fill. Instead of receiving His Love, all I got was heartache and misery. Why I couldn't (or wouldn't) see it is still a mystery to me.
It wasn't until my health issues blew up in my face, and I ended up in a pit so deep and dark that only the Hand of God could pull me out. As my health has continued to spiral downward, my faith has been the only thing keeping me sane at times. It gives me a hope to hang on to when I don't think I can stand the pain and exhaustion for one more second.
I want to live my life filled with the Hope of His Promises; the alternative is simply unacceptable to me. You see, I have seen both sides of the coin. I know what it feels like to be filled with Hope and to be devoid of it.
Today I got an image of God saying "YES!" each time I reach out to Him, and I smiled.
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The Apostle Paul learned how to be glad in any circumstance. While I'm not there yet, I'm much better than I used to be! To walk by faith is a journey of discovery. Are you ready to start yours?
I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have
plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every
situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.13
I can do everything through Him who gives me strength. Philippians 4:12-13